Reasons You Should Go Out With Me
by clearblueskies
Summary: James writes lists of reasons why a certain Lily Evans should go out with him. Does his idea work? Will you actually like this terrible oneshot? Read to find out! Featuring: THE MARAUDERS! 'Nuff said!   T for swearing


**_Reasons you should go out with me:_**

**_A/N: _Bold= Sirius**

_ Italics= Remus_

Underline=Peter

Normal=James

**_Now, on with the story!_**

REASONS YOU SHOULD GO OUT WITH ME : [Year 4]

**Ooooh! What's this?**

A list! I'm making a list and giving it to Evans so she can see how amazing I am!

_She's turned you down fourteen times already since the first time you asked her._

Why, thanks for being so awfully encouraging, Moony! Now if you'd let me start...

1. I'm smart.

2. I'm handsome.

**Not as handsome as me!**

3. I'm Quidditch captain and I'm only in the fourth year.

**So? I got on the team before you!**

...Because they held the beater's tryouts before the chaser's, genius.

**Oh... yeah.**

4. I have awesome friends.

I second that!

**Ha ha! Me too!**

_Well... I just have to agree as well!_

5. I'm better than you at Transfiguration.

_She's better than you at charms._

Your point is...

_Nothing. It was just a statement._

6. I'm WAY better than any other guys in our year.

**Ahem.**

Except maybe Sirius.

_Ahem._

And Remus.

Ahem.

And Peter. Now will you _stop_, already?

7. Especially Snivillus.

**That, I agree with.**

Cheers!

8. I rule.

_*cough*_

Shut up.

9. I'm amazing.

*coughcough*

Go away.

10. I'm awesome.

***COUGH***

I hate you all.

* * *

James ran up to Lily. "Oi Evans!"

"_What_, Potter?"

"Go out with me?"

"No."

"Read these reasons then!"

"What?"

" A list that will show you that I am the best guy to go out with!"

Lily read the list. "No."

"But-"

"No."

"But-"

"NO!"

"Okay."

* * *

MORE REASONS YOU SHOULD GO OUT WITH ME: [End of Year 5]

1. I won the Quidditch cup two years in a row.

**You?**

I'm captain, aren't I?

_And you ask why Lily thinks you're arrogant..._

2. I'm not a prefect. Enough said. Oh, wait... you're a prefect, aren't you?

_So am I..._

Ah, but you, Moony, are a Marauder. And that means you're almost as awesome as me.

**But no one's more awesome than me!**

Puh-lease, Sirius, Everyone knows I'm cooler than you.

**Are not!**

Am too!

**Are not!**

Am- wait, what's that noise?

That'd be Moony banging his head on the table.

Why?

And you do realise that you guys have been arguing on a list you want to give to Lily, right?

... Ooops...

3. I can 'Tutor' you in Transfiguration.

***hint hint* **

He he he...

4. I am awesome.

_Pathetic._

I'm going to ignore that...

5. And everyone knows it.

**God, James... You really think saying this will get her to go out with you?**

Yes. Mind your own fucking business.

6. Wouldn't you like to date the most awesomest and popularist guy in school?

_There's no such word as 'awesomest' and 'popularist'._

**Actually, Prongs, I think she would.**

Really? Thanks, mate!

**Wha-? Oh! You thought I was talking about you? I meant that... Well, I don't want to be presumptuous or anything, but... I'm pretty sure she likes me. All girls do.**

Fuck you.

_Well, thanks for listing to me._

**Heh.**

7. You're cute.

That doesn't really go on this list, you know...

Oh, fuck off.

_Will you __stop __swearing?_

Why are you so grumpy?

**It's his time of month soon...**

_Padfoot!_

**What? Oh- ha... ha ha... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!**

_Fuck you._

Oh, so it's okay for you to swear and not me?

8. Snape's no longer your friend.

_I don't think reminding her about that will get her to go out with you..._

9. Which means he can't stop you from dating me.

**He never stopped her, mate, she just hates you.**

And he would have liked it if she went out with me?

**Fair 'nuff.**

10. The giant squid doesn't want to go out with you. So that leaves me.

**Best fucking reason ever!**

**...**

**Oh, sorry, Remmy.**

_Never__ call me that again._

**Ok. Sorry, Rem.**

Oh, brilliant, Padfoot! You've got him banging his head again. Great job!

**Well, sorry, but what's wrong with 'Remmy'?**

A lot.

Actually, I quite like it.

**THANK you, Prongs.**

_Why do I hang out with you guys?_

'**Cuz we're your brothers?**

And we're all best best best _best _friends ever in the whole wide world?

And you love us?

...Awww! Group hug!

**Guys don't hug.**

The Marauders do.

**Then... group hug!**

**

* * *

**

James handed Lily the parchment.

"_Again_?" she asked, annoyed.

"Read it," James grinned, looking sure of his success.

Lily read the list he had handed her her eyes narrowing in anger as she went down the list. Her face seemed to soften ever so slightly as she read the last reason, but that moment was lost. She looked up at the boy grinning in front of her. She glared at him, murder in her eyes. The smile slid off James' handsome face faster than stinksap.

The redhead said not one word. She slapped him, _hard, _and then turned and walked towards her friends, who were standing and watching anxiously.

"What was that for..?" James wondered, rubbing his cheek, as he too walked back to his friends, who were looking at him sympathetically.

* * *

...

EVEN MORE REASONS YOU SHOULD GO OUT WITH ME: [Year 6]

1. I've stopped hexing Snape... sorta...

_'Sorta' being the key word..._

2. I can really tutor you in transfiguration!

**No '*hint hint*'? **

Nope.

_Good for you, Prongs!_

3. I'm writing poetry for you, look...!

'I need you like a heart needs a soul,

I need you like a chaser needs a goal.

I need you like bees need honey,

I need you like Malfoys' need money.

I need you more than I need twenty-five gallons, (to pay Sirius. I bet him that he couldn't finish ten jugs of pumpkin juice in one sitting. I lost.)

So will you please go out with me, Evans?

_James, that is some of the worst poetry I have ever read. Please, don't ever write poetry again._

**I agree with Moony, Prongs. Don't ever show that to Evans.**

Go away.

4. I am pretty awesome.

This reason is getting old...

5. I like you, you know.

_Oh no, Prongs, you asking her out every two seconds didn't give her a hint._

Sarcasm doesn't suit you, Moony.

* * *

James handed her the list anxiously, remembering the slap he had received the previous year.

Lily looked at it, bemused. She smiled as she handed the list back to him.

"Sorry, Potter."

* * *

...

REASONS YOU SHOULD GO OUT WITH ME: [Year 7]

1. I love you.

2. And I think... you like me too.

* * *

It's really no surprise that when James Potter gave Lily Evans the last list, she kissed him full on the mouth.

* * *

_**Well, I hope you liked it! **_

_**Please review! I love getting feedback!**_


End file.
